School. again. sigh. Christmas vacation is like the twilight zone. You live in 14 days of bliss, sleeping in, not leaving the house for 5 days, not talking to any people associated with everyday life. ever. haha. ok, so apparently it sounds like I'm the only one who does that. I use it as an excuse to be unsocial. My brother and I were talking last night about how we are so completely and totally different. When he was exactly my age in this season (winter) he went to New York. alone. 2 months after 9-11-01. at age 16. did i mention alone? I don't even like going to the grocery store alone! However, when I'm in a safe place (home...) I won't talk to any of my friends for like 2 weeks. I'm pretty sure he would die if that happened. (perhaps I'm part hobbit). Galen was so intent on growing up, (we both grew up pretty darn fast for 9 and 14) but I'm perfectly fine being 16 for a while longer. I think sixteen is the perfect age. I really don't want to grow up. I don't want to be independent in the go-off-to-college sort of way. sigh. I suppose next year and this year I'll grow a lot though and by the time I'm 18, I'll be ready to "be grown up and all on my own." I do realize that growing up isn't THAT bad. Just right now with the changes going on in my life and things shifting under my feet, I wish that things could stay like this forever. At least I know that God is the rock under my feet that will never shift or move. Even more so now than before I have to trust in him in every aspect of my life. If I didn't have him, I can quite assure you that I would be a complete and total anxious wreck. He's so calming and peaceful and steady. That's what I love about him. When something major and life changing happens, sometimes we run around like a hamster on caffeine, hyperventilating out of fear and because we're not in control for once. God just picks us up in his hands, holds us and whispers peaceful words of wisdom in our ears until we calm down, get our senses back and remember that God is in control and he will never leave us nor forsake us. After the ordeal is over we look back and realize that we benefited and grew throughout the whole thing. God is pretty much the most wonderful thing...um...ever. words honestly can't even explain what he is to me.
So this was a pretty digressful post. now at least you see the way my mind travels... :) I'm a gonna go to sleep now so that I have energy for AWANA tonight.
Have a wonderful evening!!
-Rachelizabeth
1 comment:
"sometimes we run around like a hamster on caffeine" = my favourite line ever! =]
I know exactally how you feel too love, I totally have been feeling that for like, the past year-ish. It stinks, but it's true. If we didn't have God, where would we be?! A mess, that's where!
Yeah, I feel like maybe at some times I'd really like to "go away to college" and "be on my own" but not yet. I'm just not sure I could do that yet. Though I do want out of "here" when I'm 18. Wherever "here" may be, I think it's just the farmiliar.
Well, LOVE to you, and I'll call you tomorrow to bug you about that MLK day idea ;]
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