I'm starting to get a little nervous on the fact that I haven't started my homework yet... I hate it when I'm like, "oh, dude, I've totally got this under control. It's gonna be so easy!" Then I start doing it and I'm like, "Oh crud, why didn't i start this like 5 hours ago." yea.

I am soooooooooooooooooooooooo super excited for this summer!!!!! From July 5-14 I'm planning to go to an ASL camp in Vancouver at the Washington School for the Deaf. It's for hearing high school ASL students and at the end of the 10 days we put on a small production of the Wizard of Oz. I won't know anyone. I'm stoked. :) I'm really excited about improving my signing skills too. The only negative is that it's $500. I don't have 500 dollars. I will get 500 dollars! I will! I don't know how though. Anyone have any ideas on how to raise 500 bucks by June 1st? I reaaaaaaaally want to go.

So later in July there is Drama Camp at church which I volunteer at every year.

Even later in July I'm going on a bike trip with a church group that my friend has friends in. So I will be in Canada for a week knowing no one and hopefully having the time of my life! I am so excited!!! That's $170 i think. aug. more money.... i don't have time to get a job.

In August I'm going to be the student leadership team at my school for incoming Freshman. Link Crew training days are on th 13th and 14th and then the Frosh orientation is on the....16th.

So, anyone seeing the trend yet? This summer I am taking chances, stepping out of my comfort zone and am going to have the best summer ever! I am so sick and tired of not actually living my life because I'm too scared and shy of people and stupid things!! I want to be different!! My shyness is something I am seriously going to have to get over if I am ever going to go anywhere in life. The thing is, no one else can do that for me, I'm going to have to do it myself. (surprise, surprise right?)

This summer of me stepping out of my comfort zone is also in preparation for my Senior year. I am going to have the most awesome year ever next year! You wanna know why? Because I'm going to make it that way! Attitude determines almost everything. Here's a list of what's going to be awesome my senior year...

• I'm taking classes that I'm actually excited about. They aren't freakishly hard like some of my friends' classes will be but they are definitely not easy. I'm finally finding out what my level of work ethic is, and that's moderate-hard. So my classes are some difficult mixed in with some semi-hard mixed in with super fun ones.
  
• I'm doing Link Crew (student leadership) next year. I hope it's everything I'm hoping it will be.
• Friends of Rachel is starting up again next year, I really really really want to be President!
• I'm thinking about doing Golf Team. One of my friends is going to call me this summer so i can go play with them and get a feel for what it's like on the team... we'll see how that goes.
• I'm going to try my very hardest to make friends and not assumptions. I usually never introduce myself to people because I assume people won't like me. They're usually thinking the same thing.
  

Meh, basically I am sick and tired of being quiet. I could influence so many more people for Christ if I wasn't such a lame-o introvert. the lame thing is, is that people who know me probably wouldn't say that I'm quiet... People who don't know me think I'm stuck up.

I don't know if I actually conveyed my feelings behind wanting to be different... I don't really know how to explain it. I'm just frustrated with myself. But don't worry, I'm not going to change who I am inside, I'm just not going to hide it anymore.